To be born a soilder
by LunarSheWolf
Summary: Arthur and his knights find another young female along with the woad. Also to be the sister of Aleco. Proven to be a good add to the team, she gains the attention of Arthur and Lancelot. "Pretty sure the story is better than the summary"
1. 1

It was dark and the smell was enough to make anyone faint. Yet the blond female, had been in the cell for well over two months. She was 20 from what she had said, but her body looked that of a 16-year-old. That was caused from the lack of food and water. When Guinevere arrived, she had already been there from what she guessed, two weeks. At first, she believed the girl was dead, but the faint whimpers told her otherwise. The girl had yet to tell her, her name, for she didn't speak. Only moments you'd hear her voice, were in screams. Guinevere didn't know why, but the girl prevented the sickly-looking priest from going near her. because of her, she never witnesses, nor suffer what was beyond the red door. She'd still get whipped and torture for her so called sins, but not once did they touch her sexually. She still remembers the second day here. The priest had tossed the girl back into her cell and made a move towards her. The girl was up on her feet, blocking Guinevere from the man. Yelling to take her, but to spare the Woad. It went on like that since then. There were days Guinevere didn't see her. A priest would go in for an hour or so, then the other walked in after. Luckily the hell was about to end for her. Well this one anyways.

YSMAY'S POV:

The skinny balding man pushed himself off me. Not saying a word, he walked out. I laid on the ground, trying not to move. My body was on fire, everything hurt. I had taught myself not to cry in this hell hole, but even now and then a tear slipped out. How did I end up in here you ask? Well my father deemed I should be punished for giving the workers food, said I disobeyed him, therefor I disobeyed god. Mother tried to stop him, begged to spare me, but received a beating in return. I was to die in this place. I never did understand why father despised me. Ever since I could remember, he has hated me. Pulled away from my thoughts, by the door opening, I braced myself. Angus was a brutal man. 'Please lord make this stop'.

NO POV:

Guinevere has never been so happy to see the roman and his knights. She listened as the black knight asked Arthur something. Followed by the sound of a door falling, then a body. She blocked everything out once she was in the arms of her savor.

"Water! Give me water!" Arthur yelled. Gently placing her down on the ground. Guinevere drank some, before the girl came storming into her mind.

Latching onto Arthur's arm, she pulled him down. "Red door." Her voice was merely a whisper.

Arthur frowned. "What?"

"Re-red door." She swallowed the lump stuck in her throat. "Help her please."

"Lancelot!" Arthur called. The dark knight walked closer to them. "Did you check behind a red door?"

"No."

"Go, take Bors."

Lancelot rolled his eyes, but did as ordered. As they came up to the famous door, Lancelot gave jerked his head. Bors responded with kicking the door down. Neither ready to see what was beyond the door. A girl was held up by chains, naked and bloody. A priest (if you can call him that) behind her, a whip in his hands. Hearing the leather connect with her skin, snapped the knights from their daze. Lancelot pushed past Bors and straight for the man, tackling him to the ground, giving him three very effective punches. He then reached for the knife hidden in his boot, with no remorse and pure hatred in his eyes, slit the bastards throat. Too quick of a death in the knight's mind.

YSMAY:

I was trying my best not to scream, as the whips down on me. The searing pain left, was the worst. Felt just as, if not worse, than having someone slash my back with a knife. This was routine with him, he would get off on my pain, then take me, by then nothing was able to stop my screams of pain. By what I believed to be the fifth lash, I was far gone in my pain, that I didn't notice the whips had stopped. Not until I felt unknown hands on me. My inner fighter screamed for me to fight, kicking and thrashing out.

"Calm down!" The voice was deep and seductive, an accent not of this country. Suddenly a blanket was draped over me, making sure everything that need be covered. "I am Lancelot." Looking up at him, I was taken back. He was handsome, his hair was dark and curly, eyes black/brown. He was deafenatly not of this land. "I am going to lift you now." I nodded, biting my lip to stop the whimpers. "You alright." He stated, trying to give me some comfort. As I was carried out, I was blinded by the sudden light. In an effort to give my eyes some relief, I turned and hid into the man's neck. His masculine scent for some reason calmed me. "You okay?" I simply nodded.

To my surprise I was placed on something soft, pulling back and looking around, I noticed I was seated on a fur blanket. Bors, I believed was his name, had placed it there. "Thank you." I winced at the soreness in my throat.

"My pleasure, Mi lady." Giving me a small smile, he walked away.

Lancelot was still holding me, his right leg was placed behind my back, his arm as well. It was then I noticed his missing cape, the same one wrapped around me. I hated to be such a burden to them, this man didn't know me, for all he knew I deserved to be in the hell hole.

"Ysmay?" A sweet voice, I thought I would never hear again spoke.

Looking around, I locked eyes with my mother. "Ma?" She ran towards me, careful with my back and hugged me tight. "Oh ma."

"My sweet, sweet Ysmay." She cried, her entire body shaken against me. I felt bad for Lancelot, since he was now baring the weight of my mother. "I am sorry my angel."

I was quick to stop her. "No! you have nothing to be sorry for mother. You did what you could." Smiling at the kisses she peppered me with, I glanced up at my black knight. He seemed calm, unaffected, but his eyes held shock and anger. "Sir?"

Lancelot shook his head. "My lady." He spoke to my mother. "She needs clothes."

"Of course!" Wiping her eyes, she slowly jumped to her feet. "Follow me please."

I moved to stand, but yelped as I was picked up. Looking up I was met with Lancelot's stoic face. "I can walk."

"Of course you can." Ending with a snort, he kept walking. As for me, he was already getting on my nerves.

It didn't take long to clean and change myself. Mother made sure my wounds were cleaned and bandaged. Luckily these last lashes were not as deep, as the previous ones. Still it was hell as the water cleaned them out. After I was changed into a comfortable dress, one that would allow me to ride, I followed mother out. I placed no jewelry or items, instead they will help along the way to get money, if the occasion was needed. From what I was told, we were fleeing from the farm.


	2. 2

As I walked out of my chambers I stumbled a bit, but lucky as I am, my black knight caught me. "Still here sir Lancelot?" Not that it bothered me.

Lancelot shrugged. "Can't have you getting hurt." Rolling my eyes, I allowed him to guide me out. Mother trailed behind us, like a chaperone in a date.

Taking this rare peace time, I studied the man that saved me. His armor was black, with the occasional silver. Had two swords sheathed in his back, forming and X. He was tall, about a foot or two than me. The uniform did little to hide just how well he takes care of himself.

"It's just Lancelot." His voice, pulled me out of my exploring.

Confused I glanced up. "Excuse me?"

"No sir. Just Lancelot." He explained, not once looking at me.

"Ysmay." I offered. "Thank you, Lancelot."

Giving me a slight bow of the head, he smiled. "None needed Ysmay."

As we re-united with the others I was surprised to see Arthur and father arguing. The Woad was on the ground looking between the two. I spotted my fathers guards ready to engage. That's when I stepped in. "Lower your weapons!" All eyes turned to me. My men were confused, looking between me and my father. "I am your commander and I have given you an order. Lower them now!" Lancelot was still holding my arm, but I spotted him about to reach for his sword. "Now!" One by one they obeyed, followed by taking knee.

Arthur frowned, pushing pass my father and towards me. "Lady?"

"Ysmay." I replied. "An honor to meet you." I have to say, he was taller than I was told.

"What is the meaning of this!" My father yelled. "You should be dead! Just like the rest of these sinners!" His eyes shifted towards my mother. The fire in them, blazing wild with rage. "You kept them alive!" Seeing the assault coming I, jumped in taking the hit. I stopped the guards, from responding. "insulant child!"

I heard the growl before seeing Lancelot, lunge at my father. Punching him once, he leaned in closer to him. "Touch her again and the last thing you will see is my sword."

I stared at him eyes widen. Was it wrong I got turned on by this? I really hope not.

"Lancelot." Arthur placed his hand on his shoulder. "We must get going." The dark knight dropped my father, without any care.

Glancing around I frowned. "Quin?" I called for a young stable boy. "Where is Suntaria?"

"In the stable my lady." The boy was an orphan I had taken in. I thought him to read and write, before father locked me. "Shall I bring her?"

"Yes, and the others as well." I ordered softly.

"What for?" Alecto asked.

Ruffing his hair, I grinned. "Extra horses have never hurt."

Not being able to help myslef, I sneaked a glance at the dark knight. He sat proudly on his black steed, magnificent animal it seemed. Looking away, I grinned at my horse. She was a three year old mare. Golden like the sun, with a white mane and black tail. Two of her legs were were halfway black, just like her muzzle. I had raised her since she was a filly, she was the perfect war horse and steady runner.

"Hello beautiful. Miss me?" That earned me a nicked. "Saddle her up Quin."

"Yes my lady."

"Sure you can ride?" Lancelot asked, having trotted over to me.

Glancing up at him I nodded. "Yes, I miss the feeling."

It took about five minutes to get a move on. I stayed beside my mother's carriage, still wrapped in Lancelot's cape. One I couldn't stop inhaling.

"A knight was the last one I thought you would fall for." My mothers voice called to me.

Dropping the cape slightly, I cleared my throat. "What ever you mean?"

"I am your mother Ysmay." She smiled. "You have not released the cape since we left."

Releasing a sigh, I gently played with the cape. "Not that it matters mother. He is Lancelot, Arthur's knight. I am woman who has been damaged and not of his class. Father would kill me before he allowed any of this."

"Ysmay!" My mother snapped. "What has happened is not your fault. I must apologize for not protecting you. Any man would be lucky to have you as a wife. As for the class, love has no class Ysmay. The heart wants what it needs."

Reaching over I grabbed her hand. "I missed you so much mother." She smiled fondly, kissing my palm. Unbeknownst to us Arthur had heard our entire conversation.

Arthur trotted next to his first knight. "Quiet the rider."

Lancelot glanced unresponsive. "If you say so."

"How old?" He asked.

"I don't know. Didn't ask." Lancelot knew he was up to. And like hell he was going to fall for it. "Why don't you ask her?"

"She is not interested in me." Arthur smiled.

"And she is to me?" He snapped. "Arthur do not play games with me. I am not the marrying type."

"Says who?"

"I do." Lancelot growled. "We have killed to many sons and husbands, what gives us the right to our own?"

"The same one they have Lancelot."

Giving him a look he turned his horse away. Halting the animal, he watched the villagers walk by, this was a waste of time.

Spotting Lancelot I trotted over to him, he seemed lost in thought. That was until he turned towards me. I have heard many stories of Arthur and his knights. Lancelot was his second in command, he was ruthless, cold hearted and violent. It was said he was the best one of the best swords man and magnificent rider. As well as a man whore. He slept with any and all woman he met. Now I wouldn't deny he was handsome, but a man presumed to have affairs was not for me. Now Arthur was a great man, he is loyal, had morals and seemed like an honest man. Now that was what I needed and wanted. So why couldn't I take the dark knight off my mind.


	3. 3

"I have been meaning to thank you sir." I whispered. My chest was burning with every breath and movement.

"Please my lady." Lancelot turned towards her. "No thanks are needed. If it was not for Arthur and the woad, we wouldn't have found you."

I smiled at the mention of the woad. I had yet to go see her. "Still sir, you saved me from one painful night again. I am in debt to you."

The knight shook his head. "No you are not."

I shrugged. "Yes I am." Kicking my horse into a faster pace, I left before he could protest. But was quick to slow her down, the jolting was irritating my back and wounds.

"You should not be riding, my lady." Arthur's voice startled me.

"Arthur!" I yelped.

Giving me a kind smile, he reached for my horses reins. "Here." Removing his cape he, placed it between me and the back of the saddle. "That should help with the movements."

Leaning back I sighed. "Thank you sir."

"No sir, please just call me-"

"Arthur!" Lancelot yelled. A certain strain in his voice.

"That." He chuckled. "Arthur."

"Then please no my lady. My name is Ysmay." I replied.

Giving me a small bow he turned his white steed and trotted away. Glancing back at him I couldn't help, but glanced at both of them. They were both the same yet so different. I could end up falling for either of them. Taking my spot next to mothers carriage, we kept going until night fall.

I took a quick shower, mother checking my wounds for any infection. Thank god I didn't have any. After I changed, I decided a bit of air would be good. Wrapping the red cape arm around myself, I trailed outside. The cold air was a welcoming change, to my hot skin. I walked towards the tree where my mare was currently tied at. Patting her on the neck, something bumped into my shoulder. Glancing back I smiled at the black steed and gray stallion, Arthur's and Lancelot's horses. Why do they look so much bigger than before. The black stallion was impossible to see in the night, the fog from his breath the only give away. Patting each stallion on the muzzle I leaned against my mare. Looking up at the sky, I smiled gently. It has been so long since I have seen the bright moon and sparkling stars.

"My lady." The soft yet fierce voice startled me.

"Arthur." I placed my hand on my chest, exhaling a breath. "You frighten me."

"My apologies." He smiled, giving me a small bow of the head. "May I ask what you are doing out here alone?"

Shrugging I leaned against my mare. "Wanted to take some air, it's been a while since I have seen the moon and stars." Looking up at him I smiled. "Besides I am not alone."

"Oh?"

"I have them." I gestured to the three horses.

He simply snorted. "May I ask you something?"

"Of course."

"Earlier today you ordered your fathers guards and they obeyed."

"You want to know why." I finished, which earned me a nod. Taking a deep breath, I glanced down at my hands. "I for some reason was never into religion. Father favored Alecto before me. I am the oldest, father didn't care for that. So to have to deal little of me, he gave me command of the guards. I trained and fought with them. They hold some loyalty to me, but there are some that have loyalty for my father only."

Arthur took his time to let it sink in. Glancing at the bow and arrow he smirked. "Now I know you are decent with the sword. How well are you with the bow?"

I shook my head with a scoff. "Not good. I am a good rider and a fighter, but the bow has never been my thing." He reached down, for the arrow and smiled at me. "You have to be kidding me."

Arthur shook his head. "The moon is full, which gives us enough light. I am going to teach you how to shoot. Now Lancelot would be better, but I'm here. The sword and combat are helpful in close combat. But there may come a time where you will need this."

"Says the legendary Arthur."

Arthur gave me a weird look. "The what?"

I laughed. "While I was with my father's army, I heard many stories. Of you and your knights. Your victories and blood shed. Not to mention all the heroics and lives you have saved and helped. You are a legend sir Arthur, always mounted on the whites of the steeds. Brave, ruthless, yet loyal to his knights and friends."

"You must not believe everything you hear my lady." Arthur whispered, tampering with the bow and arrow.

Placing a hand on his shoulder, I gave him a smile. "Somehow I know I can believe this." As he lifted his head up, our eyes locked. I know it was probably only a few seconds, but time slowed down a bit causing this to feel as if hours had passed on. Clearing his throat, he handed me the bow. "This is pointless."

Arthur chuckled. "I'll teach you." He moved to stand behind me. I couldn't help, but feel the heat from his body warming me up. A wonderful mixture between the cold air and his body heat. One hand laid firmly on my stomach. The other guided my elbow and hand to the right position. "Lift you hand to your cheek. The end of the arrow, just by your chin. That's it." He moved his hands to my waist, twisting me to the side. "open your legs a little bit." Using his knee, he pried my legs open a bit. "Now take slow and deep breaths." His chest was pressed up against my back, falling into a rhythm sigh my breathing. Pretty sure he could no see how sped up my heart was. I was cut in half. One part of me focused on the target, while the other focused on him. His front up against my back, his leg in between mine, hands on my waist and chin on my shoulder. His hot breath ghosting over my neck, sending chills all over me. "Now focus on the target. Helps to imagine what you hate the most as the target." His lips ever so touching my ear. 'lord help me!' "shoot when your ready."

Taking a deep breath, I released the arrow. Not knowing I had my eyes close, I felt Arthur's chest trembled against me as the chuckled. "I missed didn't I?"

"Take a look." He whispered. Cracking one eyes open, I grinned. The arrow had hit the first line. Now not the best shot, but it was in. "I have to say, not bad. Most first timers don't make it past three feet."

"Well you're a very good teacher sir Arthur." I blushed, sending a silent thank you to the night. Looking back I jumped at having him so near.

Cupping my jaw he leaned in closer. "Arthur."

"Right, no sir." Our eyes locked once more, only this time he slowly began leaning in. My heart was racing and beating labored. He was so closed, I began to close my eyes. His breath hitting me softly on the lips. Just a few more…


	4. 4

"Oh pardon me." A young voice squealed.

We both jumped, Arthur was quick to push me behind him. Pulling his sword out, but stopping at seeing my brother. The knight sighed heavily, a tone of annoyance was heard. "You must not startle men like that young Alecto."

My brother looked at everything, but at us. " Forgive me Arthur. I was in search for my sister."

Popping my head out from behind the knight, I frowned. "What is it?"

"Mother is looking for you. Come." He held out his hand for me. Rolling my eyes I nodded. He was younger than me, but still ordered me around.

Arthur grabbed ahold of my arm. "Yes?"

"We are not finished." He must have seen my confusion, since he raised the bow. "One time is not enough."

"Our mother is asking for you."

"Then we begin again tomorrow. Deal?" His eyes stared into mine intensely.

Grinning like an idiot, I nodded. "Deal. Goodnight sir Arthur." I could hear the chuckles as I walked away, followed by 'No sir.'

The moment I walked into mother's tent, I was engulfed into a hug. "Dear child, where we're you?!" Mother gasped. "Your freezing!" She quickly grabbed a robe wrapping me up.

"Just went on a walk and to check on Sunatras." I gave my mom a small smile, I really missed the feeling it gave me when she looked after me. Glancing past my her, I spotted the Woad, she looked a lot better. "How are you feeling?"

She smiled slightly. "Better my lady. Arthur helped replace my fingers." She showed me her bruised fingers. But hey she can at least move them now.

"That's good to hear." Glancing back at Alecto, I raised my brows. "Why are you still here?"

"Just waiting."

Now I was confused. "For what?"

Walking towards the tents entrance, he smirked. "Waiting to see when you tell mother who you were with."

That caused mother to perk up. "Who?" I was silently giving him warnings to keep quiet. "Alecto who?"

"Sir Arthur." He grinned. "And may I add, they stood very close together."

"You are so dead Alecto!" I yelled running after him, but before I could follow him out, mother stopped me.

"Close?" She asked.

I could see the amusement dancing in her eyes. "He was simply teaching me to shoot with the bow and arrow mother."

"That is all?" She asked.

"Yes." I tighten the robe around me.

Mother chuckled. "If you say so."

Rolling my eyes I moved towards the pile of blankets. Dropping I laid awake. It had been days since I have been allowed to sleep. The bastards of priests- if you can call them that- rarely allowed me to and when they did, my sleep was infested with nightmares. Tonight was no different, nor were my dreams. They were always the same. Locked up in the cell. In the red room. The whips, fire, belts, them. I hadn't realized I was crying, until I was shook awake.

Warm brown eyes locked with my frighten ones. Trying to control my breathing, I glanced around. Mother, Lancelot and the woad stood behind Arthur. The latter sat on my bed, his hands on my arm and eyes on me.

"You alright?" He asked.

Slowly shaking my head, I nodded. "Yes. What are you two doing here?"

"I tried to wake you, but with no success. You were crying and yelling." Mother whispered, sadness clear in her tone. "I was going to get Alecto, but I spotted Arthur and Lancelot, so I asked for their help."

Feeling the dizziness coming I fell to myside, only to have Arthur hold me up. "Easy now, are you your okay?"

As I was about to say yes, I flinched at the look mother gave. "No. My head hurts and I'm pretty I am going to be sick."

Arthur stood with a frown and simply stared at me. "Lancelot, go finish the patrol." He quickly removed his swords and boots, followed by his armor. He all, but pushed me to the side as he climbed into bed with me. I couldn't do anything, but gawk at him as he slid in and pulled me towards his chest.

"What are you doing?!"

"Well I know from experience, the best way to combat nightmares is talking or having someone near." He smiled, slipping his arm underneath my waist. "And I have a feeling you wouldn't want to talk."

"But this I inappropriate!" I tried to pull back, but his arm tighten around my waist.

"Arthur, if she is not okay with this, leave her be." Lancelot snapped.

"Mother."

My mother simply smiled. "I have to look after Guenivere and Alecto is still asleep. Arthur is right. Lancelot you are free to take a spot anywhere you'd like."

The Black Knight, simply tossed Arthur a murderous look. "No thank you, I must continue with the patrol. She seems to be in good hands."

I frowned as he stormed out of the tent. I couldn't understand why he was anger. Because of Arthur? I mean I didn't want the man in my bed, but the heat and presence was welcoming. I slowly and hesitantly lowered my head on Arthur's chest. Mother blew the candles out as she disappeared. It was then that I noticed the Woad had taken off earlier. I couldn't believe mother was okay with leaving me, here in my bed with a man.

Arthur chuckled. "Relax my lady, I won't hurt you."

Taking in a bed breath, I nodded. "Forgive me, I have never had a man in my bed. Well not voluntary anyhow." Feeling him stiff beside me, I glanced up at him. "Arthur?"

"What happened?" He asked, his voice no higher than a whisper.

"I don't want to talk about it right now." Hiding my face in his chest I cursed at the tears that slip.

The man simply hugged me closer. "Its alright, get some sleep. I won't leave you."

I took his word as a promise and allowed my eyes to shut. In no time I was gone, remembering nothing, but warmth and safeness. I felt just that all night and for the first time in months I slept without a single nightmare.


	5. 5

The next morning I woke up alone in my pile of blankets. "Oh thank God it was all a dream. I mean mother would never allow such a thing." Mumbling to myself I walked down to the lake. Washing my face and rinsing my hair, I tied it in a braid. Just as I finished a scream broke out, followed by a little boys yell. Grabbing my sword I ran back to the camp.

Father had little Joseph with a knife to his throat. Daganet was surrounded by his/my men. Making sure no one was looking my way I stalked towards my father. As I reached him, I placed the tip of my sword to his back. "I highly recommend you to let the boy go."

"You wouldn't dare." He sneered.

Pushing the tip, I smirked at the gasp.

"Do not tempt me, for I will surprise you." Glancing at the soldiers I pinned them with a glare. "Put down your weapons." Hesitant at first, I ordered again. "Do it or I will not stop them from killed you!" They turned to see Arthur and Lancelot with their swords and the woad with her bow and arrow. Quickly they each dropped their swords. "Now dear father let the boy go!" Doing as told the little boy ran into daganet's arms. Pulling my sword back, I stepped away as he feel to his knees. He will live. Turning my back at him, I had forgotten he still held his knife. Manolog pushed me to the side, same time an arrow found it's way into father's back. Looking over my guards shoulder, I noticed the arrow had come from the woad. Glancing at the man I felt nothing. No sorrow or pain. Simply pity and relief. Mother and Alecto would now be free of him and his abuse.

Manolog cupped my jaw. "Are you alright my lady?"

I nodded. "Thank you Manolog."

With a smile he kissed my hand and walked away. He was my right hand and in command when I was not around. He is my best friend. I moved to stand by mother as she cried over her husband. Alecto shed one or two tears, but that was all. After, I had my men bury him with my sword at the helm. He was my father after all. It was then that time to head out. Jumping onto my horse, I stayed close to mother's carriage. One she was upset and two something was coming. My mare was shaking with anticipation and neighing ever so often.

"Woah girl, your okay, I got you." Stroking her neck, she calmed some. Glancing at the rest of the horses I noticed they were the same.

"Everything okay?" A smooth voice, that can only be Lancelot's said. He pulled his black stallion beside mine.

I shrugged. "Not sure, she's nervous and won't stop shaking."

"Fear?"

"No she's waiting for something, I just don't know what." Stroking her ear I suddenly remembered who I was talking to. From the corner of my eyes I saw him ready to speak, but quickly closed his mouth.

"My lady." He kicked the horse, causing it to jump forward.

"Weird."

"You speak in your sleep."

I jumped turning my body around. Arthur got closer to me and I was sure I was gapping at him. "Oh god! It wasn't a dream!"

"No." He chuckled.

"How did you get into the tent?" I turned to glare at my grinning brother.

Arthur leaned forward. "Lancelot and I were just finishing with our rounds. We heard soft cries. Your mother pulled us in and ask that we wake you. It appeared they had tried to with no luck."

Looking down at my hands, I blushed. "Thank you, last night was the first I got fully sleep."

"Always a pleasure my lady." Grabbing my hand, he kissed my knuckles. "Oh, don't forget our class tonight." With that he urged his horse forward.

"I like him." Mother suddenly said.

Jumping with a yelp, I held onto my saddle. "Jesus mother! You frighten me."

"Sorry." Clearly not sorry.

"Uh-huh." Glancing down at her I sighed. "Sorry about father."

Shaking her head, she smiled. "It was only a matter of time. You knew that. I am actually surprised it wasn't you."

Laughing I shrugged. "Although I thought about it and wanted to do it, he was stilly father."

"He wasn't."


	6. 6

I froze for a moment, before turning to look at her. "What?"

"He was not your father." Her voice held relief and fear.

I looked between her and Alecto. "You knew?"

My brother nodded. "Father told me, but prohibited I ever tell you."

"I don't care what he said! You should have told me!" I was livid, now it all made sense. The hatred, the difference on kindness and affection Alecto and me. 'Father' never once showed any kind of affection towards me, always hatred and rage. "Who is my father?"

Mother was quiet, not wanting to spill. Well it is to damn late for that. "I can't tell you."

"What in the-how-why can't you tell me? All my life I have been told he was my father, only to heat it's not true! Then you say I can't know! Well I have the right to know who sired me! Who's blood runs through my veins!"

"Enough!" Mother yelled, catching all nearby peoples attention. "I will not tell you Ysmay and that is final." Disappearing back into the carriage, I glared daggers at Alecto.

"Ysmay."

I raised my hand to stop him. "I don't want to hear it." Slowing my horse, I took up the rear with Bors and Galahad.

Closing my eyes I focused on my surroundings and senses. The feel, the sound, and the smell. It was cold, the bitter of the wind hit me like a thousand little knifes. It caused my body to shake unwilling, even as I was covered in Arthurs cape. The sound of nature were no more. Where you would once hear birds singing, deer walking over the snow or the sound of the wind in the trees, was no replaced by the sound of horses pounding on the snow. Sound of carriages running over the snow. And the smell, it was nothing compared to what she smelled in the so call temple. It was clean and fresh, as if the rain had washed out the days sin.

"Everything alright my lady?" Bors gruff voice asked.

I nodded, I was yet to come to terms on what mother said. "Yes." Looking out to the front, I sighed as I saw nothing, but mountains and tress covered in snow. The roads in front frozen. "How far are we?"

Bors glanced up at the sky. "Give or take two days, but at this pace three days."

"The villagers were not in the plans I assume." I had seen the way Arthurs knights reacted at Arthurs order to take them.

Bors laughed. "No, they were not. But if you can you must."

"That's true." Riding at a steady pace, we rode in silence for about an hour. That was until I got bored. "Bors."

"Yes?"

"I am bored."

The knight gave me a look along the lines of 'and'. "okay."

"Talk."

"Talk?"

I nodded. "Yeah. You have any family?"

The man got a stupid grin on his face. "Yes my lover and I believe it's a dozen of my bastards."

"11." Galahad muttered.

Bors frowned. "Ahh yes 11."

"What about home?" I asked. "I understand you are all planning on going home."

"Yes, after we get you all to the wall we will be free men." Bors laughed. "I will command my own village and Dagonet will be our bodyguard. Isn't that right Dag!?" Dagonet simply glanced his way. "What are you planning on doing after this?"

I shrugged. "I don't know. Will just have to go with the flow."

Bors began to tell me of the time he saved Arthur and Lancelot from invaders. It was filled with gore and glory. "I was suddenly surrounded by fifty men. All nasty looking."

"Last time there were 60." Tristen rode up beside his mate. "Or so I heard."

"No, no the day before I believed he said 100." Lancelot added having appeared beside me. "Or was it 101?"

Bors grumbled lowly, but just clearly for us to hear. "Assholes."

Laughing under my breath, I once more got lost in my own thoughts. Jumping at the hand landing on my shoulder. Glancing to the side I locked eyes with the dark knight.

"Are you alright? Seem lost." He whispered.

I shrugged. "I am okay. Simply thinking." Clearing my throat, I gave him a smile. "What about you?"

Lancelot quirked a brow. "What about me?"

"Any stories?" He shook his head. "What about your home land?"

The man tensed, squeezing my shoulder. "Very little. I was just a boy when they took me." I spotted Tristen, Galahad and Bors slowing their pace. "I remember my father telling me 'Soldiers come back as great horses'. Mother holding my youngest brother, who must already be in the army if not, training. My youngest sister gave me this for luck." He showed me a necklace of a roaring lion, carved with amazing detail. "But what I do remember with detail is green pastures larger than you ever ride, from horizon to horizon. The sky, bluest and brightest you have ever seen. I vaguely remember getting up before dawn would break and ride until midday. It would fee as if I was flying."

Hearing him speak with such sensitivity was breathtaking. "You will go home Lancelot. You and your brothers have earned it."

He gave me a weak smile. "I wouldn't even know where home is. So many years away, i'd be a stranger among my own."

"Please, You'll have a wife and kids within the year." I teased, happy to see a smile on his lips.

"I have no right to my own sons."

"You have the right as any man. I cam already see it. The great Lancelot teaching his little boy to ride his first horse." I chuckled at the image in my head. A mini Lancelot perched in front of his father, laughing and playing.

"No, I much prefer a girl. I wish no son of mine this life." Lancelot said.

"Fine. The great Lancelot chasing suitors away. How's that?"

"Better."

Rolling my eyes, I urged my horse forward, but his hand held down on mine. He didn't speak nor did I make a move to leave. I could hear the knights snickering behind us. And although I caused me to blush, I didn't allow it to faze me. Lancelot of course was the one to break the silence. "Your mother and you seem to be at odds."

I laughed humorlessly. "Is it that obvious?"

"The shouting was a hint." He smiled.

Looking down at my hands, I huffed in defeat. "Mother just informed me, that the man I believed to be my father is not. When I questioned who it was, she ended the conversation. Saying she will not reveal my true fathers name."

"I am sorry." He said somewhat hesitant. Clearly the man didn't know what to say.

"It's quiet alright actually. He never cared for me and I him. It's actually a relief to tell you the truth." And that was the truth. I had a huge weight lifted off my shoulders in knowing I did not carry that mans blood. I had no relation to him, but it stung in not knowing who was my father. I wanted to know, if only his name.

"My lady?" Lancelot pulled me out of my thoughts. "You disappeared."

"Sorry, got lost in my mind."

"Want to say?" He asked curiously, but not prying.

I felt slightly stupid. "My father. Just wondering what he was or is like. At first I didn't understand why I loved to battle, ride and spar. Alecto never liked it and his father disliked swords and horses. I am much lighter than the two of them and my eyes are of no one in my family."

Lancelot leaned in, staring into my gray/green eyes. "One of a kind. I believe they are all traits of your father. From what you tell me, makes me believe you have a soldier's blood. That would explain your likes and courage."

I frowned. "A soldier? I know mother was with child before marriage."

Lancelot thought for a moment. "Was the marriage arranged?" I nodded. "Perhaps a lover? One before the wedding."

"Perhaps." Maybe mother had loved another man. Gave him her love and body, only to be separated. Was I the child of a prohibited love? Or of an abuse. Mother explained how her village was invaded by Roman soldiers. Destroying everything and killing all. Some were spared to join the army and the women were used against their will. But not mother or so she said.


	7. 7

"Lancelot!" Arthur called, standing by a cliff. Giving me a tight smile, he rode towards his commander.

"So a soldiers daughter?" Galahad asked, taking up my left side.

Tristian appeared on my right. "Well I believe that makes her on of us."

I smiled slightly. "Maybe. For all I know I can be a dogs daughter."

Bors barked out laughing, shoving Galahad aside. "I see no fur of tail. Got any fleas?" Slapping him on the shoulder, he laughed harder.

"A true soldier's daughter carries the spirit you do. Head of your own guard, I can tell you are good with the sword and an exceptional rider. You my lady carry the blood of a soldier." Dagonet said as he passed by us.

Grinning I sat up straight, immediately regretting as my back burned. "I guess that's makes you all my brothers."

"Not yet." Bors spoke seriously, causing my smile to fall. "You we call a cadet in training."

My grin came back. "I can handle that."

"Good." Tristan clapped. "Now excuse us, Arthur is calling." I received a pat on the head as they ran off. I couldn't seem to take the stupid grin off my face.

The day was quickly turned to night. We once more took shelter in the trees. I spent the majority of the night outside, siting in between my mares front legs. Ever so often she'd nudge me in comfort. Only going into my tent once, to bathe and change. Not once did I speak did I speak to mother. Not that she even tried to speak. Looking up at the sky I felt comfort wash over me.

The woods always look different at night. Everything has an unfamiliar slant to it. As if the daytime trees and stones had gone to bed and sent slightly more ominous versions of themselves, to take their place. The sound of footsteps had me stiff with somewhat fear, only when my horse snickered did I relax. I recognized the sound of his armor and sword clanging against each other.

"Arthur." I mumbled.

"You should not be out alone Ysmay." Arthur said, appearing on my left with a bow and arrow.

Shrugging I moved over. "With you around, I doubt I am ever alone."

"That is beside the point." He seemed some what tense. "It's rather cold out tonight, what are you doing?"

"I hadn't realize, I was simply trying to get some peace. Mother won't talk to me and being in the tent suffocates me."

Arthur nodded. "I heard."

With a scoff, I looked back up at the sky. "Which one? That fact that I am a bastard? Or the fact that everyone, but me knew?"

"Would you like me to leave?" He took a step back. "The lesson could wait until tomorrow."

"No please. I could use the company." I didn't want to see his face. I felt weak asking him to stay with me. "If you'd like."

Arthur held his hand out to me. "Come with me." Not sure what he planned, but I took it. He pulled me up, walking a few feet away, Arthur sat on the ground, his back against an old tree. Pulling me down with him, I gently snuggled closer to him. His arm held my by the waist. "Have you spoke with your mother at all?"

I shook my head, wincing as I hit the metal of his armor. "No, she won't even look at me. I don't understand why she just won't tell me."

"I am not one to answer that." Arthur muttered. His free hand running smoothly through my hair. "Why don't you tell me about your life? I know your good with the sword and horses. Just found out your somewhat decent with the arrow."

"Well I have a bit of medical training. I can care for an arrow and sword wound. Well…depends where the wound is. I trained all our horses and dogs." I was simply spilling things out. My mind was stuck in the fact that I was in his arms. The cold no longer fazed me, as his warmth covered me completely.

"Well that is very good information." He whispered. "Wait, what dogs?"

I chuckled. "I have bred and trained them. They run loose in the woods, come when called." I smiled as his arms tighten around me.

"The stars are very bright tonight."

"Beautiful." The midnight sky was littered with bright little stars. "It has been a long time since I have seen the sky."

Arthur reached for my chin and guided me to face him. "What happened to you?"

I was quick to change the subject, my eyes darting to the ground. "So I heard Gwen was better, thanks to you."

But he wasn't having it. "Please. I want to know."

"Why? You can't do nothing to change the past Arthur." Glancing back up at him, I got lost in his soft brown eyes. They were intense, but gave me trust. "There is nothing you can do."

"No, but I can understand you. Help you overcome what little I can." Cupping my jaw, he leaned his forehead against mine. "Please let me understand."

I was taken back, he was begging for me to speak, the great Arthur. Begging. It just seemed so wrong. "They abused of me. At first it was simply whips and…knifes. On the really bad days there was fire and swords. It went like that until a young girl, before me died. I saw them drag her body into a cell and dump her. She was bloody and…and…broken."

"Hey look at me." He paused, looking straight into my eyes. "I got you. Just breath." Inhaling and exhaling, inhaling and exhaling. I followed his rhythm, breathing alongside him. "Good. That's good. Just breath."

As I calmed myself, I continued. "The day of her death was pretty normal, whips, slaps and kicks. Then the next it changed. They dragged me into the room and stripped my clothes." I took a few more breaths. Pulling myself closer, I hid my face in his neck. "One after another and another. They didn't stop. No matter how much I fought and begged they kept coming. When Gwen came in, she was so young. I saw the look on their eyes. I couldn't let them take her. So I allowed myself to be taken. I felt so dirty and disgusting."

Arthur hugged me closer. "Shh, no you were brave. Not only did you survive that hell, but you protected and saved Gwenevier. You had no choice Ysmay. Do not think of yourself less than what you really are."

I frowned, but didn't leave spot. "What's that?"

"You are brave, beautiful, brave, honest, kind, beautiful and one hell of a soldier." He spoke softly into my hair.

"You said beautiful…twice." I whispered.

"Because you are. Any bastard would be lucky to have you as a wife." He mumbled.

I pulled back, looking up at him once more. "Thank you Arthur."

The knight smiled. "Anytime." Pulling away, he quickly grabbed his bag and placed it as a pillow. "Lets get some sleep."

I frowned. "Here?" He nodded. "Arthur you sure? You have your tent."

The commander pulled me down, causing me to land on his chest. He grabbed his cape, draping it over us. "I always preferred the outdoors."

As I felt my eyes get heavier, I draped my hand across his stomach. "Arthur?"

"Yes?"

"Will you stay?" I felt wrong asking him, but who cares.

"I am not leaving."

And just like that I allowed sleep to over take me. His arm holding me closer, in a tight, un breakable hold. His fur cape sealing our body heat around us. His scent surrounding me. The sound of his heart beat lullabying me to an even deeper slumber. This was heaven in hell.


	8. 8

woke to the sound of voices. I laid still as I listened.

"I don't think I have seen him like this before." Tristen mumbled.

"What asleep?" Bors grunted. "All the time."

"He means actual asleep." Galahad laughed. "Arthur is a very light sleeper, he would have heard us before we spotted him."

"Might have something to do with the girl in his arms." Bors laughed.

I heard them take a step forward. "Well even I sleep well with a woman in my arms. So, who is waking him up?"

"Galahad! Bors! What's taking so long?!" Lancelot yelled. I could hear him getting closer, followed by the abruptly stop he made. "What is this?"

"Well Lancelot it appears they are sleeping." Bors said in a teasing matter.

I felt more that heard Arthur being kicked on the foot. "Wake up we must get going." That was Lancelot. I listened to them walk away.

"Morning." Arthur whispered.

Glancing up at him, I chuckled. "Your hair."

"What about it?" His voice was deep and gravel with sleep.

Reaching up I soothed the wild strands. "There we go." Pushing off him, I grabbed his cape an wrapped myself in it. "Thank you for last night."

Sitting up, he cupped my jaw, a gentle smile on his lips. "Don't thank me." Kissing my hand he helped me up and left.

Glancing around I noticed the entire camp was awake. My people were picking up the beds, turning off the fires and gathering their items. Quin was attending to the horses, hooking some up and saddling others. I turned towards the Arthur and his knights. They were huddled by the end talking amount themselves. The air was heavy this morning, as if it were trying to suffocate you. The trees were quiet, not even the wind made a sound. The only sound beside us were the drums. Same drums I have come to learn they mean death.

Jogging to my tent I quickly changed and reached for a cape. Ironically I now held both Arthur's and Lancelot's capes. I held each in my hand, both were so different, yet they caused the same in me. Lancelot screamed dangerous, yet he was a man whore, gambler and drinker. My 'father' although hid it well, was all those things. Arthur gave out vibes of mystery, I couldn't figure him out. Decided now was not the moment, I grabbed a wolf fur I had and wrapped it around me. Mother continued to ignore me as I readied myself. Mounting my horse I approached Lancelot as he got the people to move quicker.

"Morning."

He refused to look my way. "Morning lady."

I was slightly confused by his attitude. "Umm, okay, I just came back to give you this." I held out his black cape. Lancelot looked from it to me. Without a word he grabbed it and continued with his task. "Well I guess your busy." Turning my horse I trotted over to Arthur. "Hey."

"Ysmay hello." He smiled softly.

I spotted Gwen sitting by the edge of the carriage. "Oh forgive me, did I interrupt?"

Gwen shook her head. "No we were simply enjoying each other's company."

Glancing at Arthur and back at her, I got the sense that something else was going on. "Arthur, I just wanted to give this back to you."

He frowned. "Why?"

With a slight chuckle, I pulled him closer and placed his cape back on. "Your armor is not complete without it. Besides I have no need for it anymore. But thank you, it did help a lot."

He reached over and tucked a stray hair behind my ear. "I said don't thank me. I do it because I want to." His hand trailed to by back, carefully running up and down. "How are your injuries?"

Holding back the shivers that wanted to run loose, I leaned closer to his warmth. "They are much better. The fabric still irritates them, but no longer in danger of infection."

"That's good, still I don't believe you should be riding." He mumbled.

"I am fine." Just as I was about to leave, I glanced once more at him. "Lessons?" He gave me a nod.

Taking my spot beside mother's carriage, we continued to walk. On occasionally mother would appear at the widow for fresh air, but never made an intent of talking with me. It was killing me, not having her talk to me. I spent so much time longing for her that it was painful. Yet I was just as proud and hardheaded as she was, that my ego would not allow me to take the first step. Instead I would simply slow the horse down and stay behind.

"So we have a bet going." Bors said as he appeared beside me.

"I don't gamble."

His laughter echoed through the mountains. "No you are the one that will settle it."

Humoring him, I shrugged. "Very well, what's the bet?"

"Who you will pick." Galahad said.

"What?"

"Arthur or Lancelot." Tristen added.

I was gapping at each one. "Neither!"

"So you just slept in the arms of one and flirt with the other?" Dags jumped in. Seriously when can he not stay quiet when I want him to.

But it got me thinking. If it was true that either of them felt something, would I pick one? Did I feel something? Looking up to see all eyes on me, I growled. "Neither, they are just friends. Beside Arthur is just being nice. And Lancelot is well being Lancelot."

"Very well, we will simply wait for you to choose." Galahad grinned, leaning in closer. "But I would hurry."

I scowled. "And why is that?" He pointed towards Gwen and Arthur, who at the moment we're talking rather closely. I shrugged looking away. "That means nothing to me Galahad. Arthur is simply a friend." The men chuckled as the speed off. They were seriously getting on my nerves. Glancing back at Arthur I felt my chest tighten at the smile he gave her. Could he be feeling something for her?


End file.
